Every month I go back and forth between wanting to be someone who posts all the time on social media to document my life and also not touching social media for days to weeks at a time. I struggle with a healthy in between. I’m a chronic Instagram story poster.
I want to preface this blog post by saying I’m not talking bad about anyone specifically. You do you.
I post a lot on Instagram. If I see something funny or relatable, I’ll post it on my story. Most of the time what we post is to control how people perceive us or a narrative we want to build about ourselves. I mean, that’s the whole point of Instagram. To post your life (of course only the good) for others to see and make assumptions about you.
There’s also no doubt you post monthly recaps for just yourself as well. The thing with posting on social media, is that it’s never 50/50. You’re either posting more for yourself and the memories, or to show people you’re interesting and this is what you have done the last month. The next time you post (on your story or your feed) ask yourself why.
Social media is a wonderful connection and education tool, but humans have taken what once was a small entertainment thing to the extreme. I remember posting the shittiest photos on Instagram when it came out just to post. Now I edit my photos and meticulously choose the photos that will go in my carousel and in what order. How did that turn into a whole 15+ minute ordeal?
I turn my likes off on my posts, yet I still go in and check the number.
We scroll on TikTok for entertainment, but then can also fall down a rabbit hole of negative headlines and things we don’t want to see but can’t seem to pull ourselves away from. There’s a fine line between you controlling the internet and it controlling you.
You are what you consume.
What I’ve been thinking about lately is how the “positives” from being constantly accessible online is slim. Anyone that I would like to have access to me can contact me off social media. My notifications on all my socials are turned off on my phone. That is one thing I will never turn back on.
The internet doesn’t always need access to you. Move in the shadows. Make promises to yourself and keep them without letting strangers weigh in. If you’re doing it to control the perception of you, you’ll never succeed. Celebrate your wins in private and with those closest to you. We lose the value of intimacy if we share with everyone.
Not everything you see on Instagram needs to be put on your story. Because we have also fallen down a trend where you need to be an activist to care about something. Lots of things on our stories are performative, and you know it. Not to say we should stop spreading awareness on very important topics, but really think about why you’re posting it. Because you care about it, or because you want other people to think you care about it?
Again, the internet doesn’t always need access to you. Let people wonder what you’re up to. Do things for you and you alone. Take pride in keeping things to yourself and your closest people. Make things special again.
Every so often I remove all my social media apps from my phone. It’s always my favorite thing. You can still take pictures and videos and hangout with people, but it doesn’t always need to be posted. Connection doesn’t have to come from social media.
Find and be yourself without the internet telling you what’s right or wrong. Let others post to control their narrative and you don’t speak on it. Let people assume. The only ones assuming are the ones who don’t know you. Why do you need to perform for them? Are you a little circus monkey?
Most of this blog post is really just a love letter to me. But really think about it. Why are you posting? Is this for family and friends? Or because you want people to think you’re doing this or that? Or hanging out with these people or not?
Be intentional, and don’t lose yourself to a screen.
